Sometimes I feel like we are losing a culture. I don’t know if it is just because I’m getting older…or if it’s only because I’m finally starting to feel the beer. But I stand by my statement, however…let me make it sound a little more ominous….
Our culture is dying.
We are surrounded by these Dora the Explorererers/I-Carlyerers/Big Time Rushers and they just don’t know what good TV/music really fucking is. I say “Camp Anawanna we hold you in our hearts, and when we think about you it makes me wanna fart”…and these bitches look at me like a leper.
Fuck off. Dora. Fuck off….you and your trashy cousin too. No one is impressed by all these animals you save and shit. And that Boots bitch is about to cut your ass.
You’ve been warned, Dora….you goddamn whore.
It’s just sad, man. An atrocity. Fucking mind blowing. These shows I watched fucking shaped who I am now today…well that and being fat…and watching 7 t 12 hours of SNL a day during my summer vacations…while eating 4 chicken burritos…and 2 corndogs a day….I don’t want to talk about it.
Corndogs are a gateway drug…to be perfectly honest. Did I mention I used to be fat? Like, parents had to lie to me to not ruin my adolescent self-esteem, fat…which is still dwindling btw.
Any who…I will never forget getting into a scream-fest with my mother at the mere age of eight because all the kids on Hey Arnold got to roam the streets of NYC and they were only nine…so why the fucking fuck could I not ride my bike down my fucking street?!
…it’s still a sore subject.
But this shit shapes us…influences us…forces us to see why we are so obviously smarter than our elders.
What are these kids going to be like when they are older? Bitches and dicks? It’s all those flashing lights and bright colors on these new shows, fucks with your mind. Believe me, as a nanny, I've been forced to watch some shitty ass, brightly colored shows.
So thank you, Yo Gabba Gabba, for ruining all of our lives. With all those bright lights and glitter…and I don’t even want to talk about how that freaky green thing dances better than me.
But I do honestly believe that these shows will have an influence on the younger generation…which Pete and Pete so obviously did on me.
These kids will be our future politicians/engineers/NASA and shit people…do you really think you’ll be able to sleep at night when you find out that the President elect in 2036 favorite show was I-Carly?
…yeah.
Welcome to the Apocalypse.
Well put.... and corndogs as gateway drugs??? haha The next thing you know you are mainlining Hostess and Hot Pockets!! Dont do it kids of today!!!
ReplyDeleteYou are so right. So right. It is really sad that these kiddies' idols are Bieber and cracked out Disney Channel stars. I wonder if the generation before us said this about us when we were growing up. I am sure they did, but now it has gotten worse. And it will continue.
ReplyDeleteI feel the same way and believe that this generation is filled with A-holes but then I read a rant about how The youth are a-holes and don't respect authority and parents. It was written before Christ was born.
ReplyDeleteThank you for the lovely reminder about that show. I had forgotten it even though I used to watch it nonstop as a kid. Even if you want to - you just can't raise kids now like we were raised. DCFS comes after you if you send your kid out to play all day. Hell, my parents never even knew where my brother and I were. They both worked all the time and we did our thing all over the neighborhood.
ReplyDeleteYou'll come around to it, just like my parents did. Years ago, when South Park was first on the air and became the thing to watch for every high schooler in the world, my Dad hated that we watched it. I vividly remember him flipping the channel right to the point in their first Christmas episode when Mr. Hanky jumps out of the toilet and belts out a hardy "Howdy Ho." He quickly flips away and barks at me, "I can't believe you watch trash like that." Cut to last year and he's telling me while trying to suppress laughter the hilarious hijinks of Cartman trying to convince Butters that the world is full of zombies and locking him in a refrigerator so he can go to "Casa Bonita." He even did the Cartman voice when he said "Casa Bonita." I had to be brought back to life with a defibrillator.
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